I want to make it perfectly clear that I have never, ever, not once, done any of the things on the following list.  No, not me.   I know some people who have, though, and they told me these things.  It was yesterday, during the time I had set aside to work on my novel, when suddenly I got the idea to write this blog post.  So I emailed those people and when they weren't available, I called them all.  Here's what they told me:

1. Don't plan ahead.  Don't have any idea what you are going to write about, or what chapter you want to work on. 

2.  Don't reread your work ahead of time.  Don't look at the chapter you most recently finished to keep it fresh in your memory. 

3.  Open all of your email inboxes so that you can constantly check for new mail while you are writing.  Then be sure to take time to answer every single email that comes in right away–the second it comes in is best.

4.  Keep all of your favorite websites open so that you can constantly switch over to them.  You never know when breaking news will happen now, do you?

5.  Keep your phone next to you, keep it turned on, and whatever you, answer ever call that comes in during your writing session.  Every single one.   That telemarketer is lonely, so lonely, and just waiting to talk to you.

6.  Drink a lot of water, so you have to get up and go to the bathroom a lot.  Then, on the way back from the bathroom, you can veer into the kitchen to fix yourself a snack.

7.  Realize that you have now eaten too much and are a slug.  Decide that taking a walk will help the slug situation and clear your head for writing.

If you have any other things that you would like to add to this list, please feel free.