In the United States, tomorrow is Thanksgiving day.
News flash, right? Not.
If you're anything like me, and I like to think that you are, your inboxes and online readers are probably clogged with bloggers and marketers telling you all about gratitude and why it's so important. And even I jumped onto the bandwagon yesterday, with a post on creating energy that included some bits on gratitude.
Because of all this (or maybe despite it all), I've been thinking a lot about gratitude. And what I think is that sometimes in our very human way, we do gratitude all wrong in a couple of ways:
1. We see gratitude at the booby prize. Oh lord, I'm so guilty of this. It's like, if I can't have what I want (and if anybody is listening, a publishing contract for my novel is at the top of my list) then I have to settle for what I've got. Settling. Ugh. What a dull, boring, blah energy there is to that word, at least in the way I've used it. And who wants to spend time being grateful for anything dull, boring and blah? Not me.
2. We use gratitude in order to get something. We're told that if we're only grateful for what we have, we'll get more. If we are grateful for the money we have, more will come to us. And so on. And, the thing is, I believe this is true. But wouldn't it be nice just to be grateful for what we've got for the sheer lovely joy of it? Which I think is the true intent of most spiritual and religious practices which emphasize gratitude.
And I think that is how to do gratitude right: just do it. Because you really do probably have more than 99.9% of the rest of the world. As Anna Griffin, a columnist for my local newspaper put it this morning, "No whining on the yacht." Cuz must of us are steering pretty good little boats, even with all the terrible problems of our troubled world.
It really is pretty damn wonderful that we still have a holiday that is devoted to the practice of gratitude. Well, and eating. But the point is to eat the abundance for which we are grateful. And so tomorrow, as my extended family gathers around the table to eat our feast, we'll go around the table and take turns saying one thing we're grateful for. And as I try to think about what one thing I'll say, there's so much I'm grateful for, truly, deeply grateful for, that I can't even begin to narrow it down.
So I'll say this: I'm grateful that I have so many wonderful things in my life that it is difficult to choose just one thing.
And, by the way, my loyal and wonderful blog readers are included in the many wonderful things in my life that I'm grateful for. What are you grateful for this year?
The awesome raindrop turkey was designed by my the very talented graphic designer, Christine Rains. Check out her website here. You'll see why I'm so grateful that she also happens to be my sister. Plus she's bringing mashed potatoes and hard sauce for dinner tomorrow.
J.D. Frost
Welcome back, Charlotte. It’s tough to find anything wrong with Thanksgiving. I know I have a rep of being the first to whine. My yacht seems to be sailing aimlessly, but I’ll restrain myself—just for this week. I have much to be thankful for. Your blog and your friendship are well up the list. David put up a great post in your absence. Still it is good to see you back.
Charlotte Dixon
J.D., I’m so grateful for your friendship as well, I always love seeing your name in the comments. And I’m so pleased that you and David got a good dialogue going. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and comment, it means so much to me.
Angela Artemis
Charlotte,
Count me among those writers who’s written a Thanksgiving post on gratitude. I do think it’s important to be grateful simply because when your grateful for everything in your life – you’re happier. And, when it comes right down to it what else is there? As they say, “we can’t take it with us.” All we’ll ever have is our memories – so I say – make them happy ones.
I just wanted to stop in and say Happy Thanksgiving to you and let you know that I’m grateful to know you. I’ve been busy lately and have not commented, but I’m still hear reading your awesome blog whether you see me or not.
I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving Day.
Angela Artemis
Charlotte,
Count me among those writers who has written a Thanksgiving post on gratitude. I do think it’s important to be grateful simply because when your grateful for everything in your life – you’re happier. And, when it comes right down to it what else is there? As they say, “we can’t take it with us.” All we’ll ever have is our memories – so I say – make them happy ones.
I just wanted to stop in and say Happy Thanksgiving to you and let you know that I’m grateful to know you. I’ve been busy lately and have not commented, but I’m still hear reading your awesome blog whether you see me or not.
I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving Day.
Derek
I am usually grateful whenever I care to look at where I am in life, but I see it as something that manifests spontaneously. When something “bad” happens, I can’t force a feeling gratitude for what’s outside it. I can pay it lip-service and then get back to being miserable about it.
The darkness needs as much attention as the light, and because it was my life long tendency before Zen, to block darkness out of my awareness, there are lots of negative reactions to resolve and transcend by plunging my awareness into my reactions. Paradoxically, I am grateful for having created this skill of acceptance… Now back to being content in my misery, if that’s what the day brings! :-)
Charlotte Dixon
Derek, I agree that its important to acknowledge the darkness, but often after I’ve done that, then I can see what there might be to be grateful for.
Angela, It is good to see you here! I know you’ve got a lot of wonderful things going on, and I’m guilty of not visiting you often recently, either. True confession: I have read nearly every gratitude post and email that has come my way and at the moment, I feel positively drenched in it, which is pretty wonderful.
David Paine
Well, I’m yet another who blogged on the gratitude theme this season. And since it took me until last night to get it pulled together, I am, as usual, bringing up the rear. But no matter. I’m grateful I still have coherent thoughts to write down.
Re your post, I couldn’t agree more with your “just do it” advice. Settling and/or expecting a prize take all the power out of gratitude. And it can be quite a force it you let it be.
On to Xmas … let the cliches and tacky sentimentality fly! So bloggable!
Charlotte Dixon
Hey, we did so well with our gratitude posts, I bet everyone is desperate to see what we come up with for Christmas, right? In truth, its pretty damn great to have so much to be grateful for….
David Paine
Something will certainly present itself for an Xmas post – if not from the late bloomer angle, for a Marketini, which will have become a real blog by then. I think.
Charlotte Dixon
Oh, I’m so excited that the Marketini may become a “real” blog! Keep me posted, you know what an admirer I am of it!