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Charlotte Rains Dixon  

A Love Letter About Imposter Syndrome

I’m an imposter.

Photo by Kaitlyn Baker on Unsplash

That’s what the thoughts running through my head as I wrote this morning told me.

I’m not a real writer, I thought as I wrote dialogue between two brothers sitting at a coffee shop. This as I finished up Chapter Eight of a book I started in January. (I now date my chapters as I save them, so I can keep better track of how long it is taking me.) A real writer would be able to make this dialogue much crisper.

You call this writing? A real writer wouldn’t have written a crappy sentence like that. You’re not a real writer. Never mind that this is a first draft, and I’m working on laying the story down, not making perfect sentences.

Ursula LeGuin is a real writer. This thought rising as I write the word steering and think of the title of one LeGuin’s book on writing, “Steering the Craft.” But I’m not a real writer, because I’m not Ursula LeGuin.

All of this is nonsensical. My logical mind knows that. But somewhere deep in my subconscious, imposter thoughts lurk and surface when I’m writing. Does this happen to you? I think it happens to all writers at one time or another.

And it’s funny, because trying to capture the essence of this negative messages can be difficult. They flit away back into the depths of the brain, not wanting to be brought up into the light.

Because if they are brought up to the light, they dissipate. Pouf. Like the silly thoughts they are, they disappear into the air. And so that’s what you—and I—need to do to them when they appear. Say “thanks for those insights,” and keep on writing.

Recognize—and then ignore in favor of writing. It’s the way out. The funny thing is, the imposter thoughts aren’t as strong or prevalent when I’m not writing. And often these days I don’t even notice them.

Which leads me to believe this simple fact: the cure for all problems related to writing is to just keep writing.

Prompts

Here is your prompt of the week:

It seemed so unreal.

Something New

Here’s my ko-fi, where you can buy me a cup of coffee or any kind of drink you’d like (so far it has been running toward wine). Thank you in advance for the treat!

Happenings

So much going on as spring struggles to arrive! I’ve got two spring retreats on the calendar, one virtual and one local. I’m teaching in a bucolic location on the Oregon coast this June, and of course, there’s France in September. Read on for all the details.

Free Live Virtual Spring Retreat—Many of you enjoyed the winter retreat I co-led with my dear friend Patty Bechtold, and so now we are offering a spring version, complete with reflective writing, guided meditation, poetry, and more. You can read about it and sign up here .

Refresh, Renew, Retreat—For my Portland readers, Let’s Go Write is hosting a one-day retreat, which will be a chance to spend tons of time writing, enjoy the camaraderie of other writers, and get some one-on-one coaching. More here. Space is limited to eight, and a couple people have already committed, just saying.

France 2019—Would you like to study writing in the south of France with me? You can! Find all the details here.  Space is filling up fast so hop on over and check it out!

Novel-Writing Workshop—I’m also teaching at the Sitka center on the Oregon coast this June. This is a beautiful location conducive to learning and writing. Click here for more info.Facebook Group

And of course, don’t forget to join the Facebook group if you haven’t already. I post lots of good links and often we get some good conversation going.

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